The Forgotten Necessity of Self-Care

Whether it’s a homemade avocado face mask, a five dollar planner from Walmart, or a monthly membership to the local gym, we as a society are constantly making purchases in pursuit of our best selves. Our quest to buy our way to self-love, however, serves merely as a materialistic band-aid on the wound of our well-beings. Products marketed towards self-care too often diminish our differences, rather than embellishing our oddities. In a modern culture that is seemingly advancing toward the acceptance, even celebration, of characteristics that were once deemed “flaws,”millennials now raise the question: “Are the things I was conditioned to believe are imperfections, the differences defining my identity?” This being said, our incessant contributions to the mass consumption of products may only improve our well-being temporarily, and by a minuscule fraction, rather than promoting our emotional enhancement through self-reflection and lifestyle changes.

So why does our society opt for a consumerist, surface-level approach to self-care? In a world where social media manipulates our physical and emotional appearance within a snapchat filter or fifteen second instagram clip, our self-esteem has become increasingly dependent on the frivolities of a like or follow. We can at times wallow in self-absorption, consumed by the excess or lack of these vanities, rather than reflecting on the aspects of our confidence causing such fragility in our self-perception. On the contrary, however, humility is just as well frowned upon, depicted as “passive” and “lacking confidence.” Perhaps it is this polarization that makes hypocrites out of us all, as we so eagerly endorse the acceptance of imperfections to others, while sheltering our own values and self-image under the guise of self-improvement.

One possible solution to the double negative? Balance. Our societally conceived “imperfections” cannot be ignored nor fixed with our wallets or social media following. We need only to see past others’ definitions of what constitutes self-love, and dare to create achievable goals for ourselves. Self-awareness is key to self-care; it guides humans to define our own wants and desires. We may question the fleeting nature of our feelings from time to time, but self-improvement should not be a full time job.

Here are some tips for re-evaluating your approach to self care:

1. Be self-aware. Allow yourself to embrace the gap between your personal characteristics and what society perceives as “normal”and “beautiful”, while encouraging others to do the same. Failure can be a blessing- recognizing your mistakes and the circumstances that led you to make them is essential for personal growth. To learn to fail gracefully is to begin your regrowth.

2. Patience is a virtue. Personal change may take immense effort and time . Remember to take one step at a time while relinquishing the best version of yourself.

3. Be proactive. Your voice is always one worth hearing. In class discussions, on social media, and even when your brain needs to follow a train of thought- do not allow your voice to be silenced.

4. Maintain an open mind. Immerse yourself in discussion with those who differ from your personal beliefs. Moral cleansing is boring- diversification allows new, evolving ideals and excitement.

5. Be independent. Try new things because you want to, not because others think you should.. Before you ask your parents or friends to help you solve a problem, give yourself a chance to figure out how you stand when you stand alone.

6. Recognize materialism versus idealism. In a society which profits from the emotional vulnerability of the teenage market, do not must not allow commodities to dictate personal r routines of self-care. Self-initiate efforts to improve rather than depend on the quick-solutions revered in modern society.

7. Recognize self-worth.We tend to focus on displaying compassion and love towards one another before we can successfully implement it within our own lifestyle. Start with you and listen to the voices inside your head. Are you on your own side, are you your own advocate? Choose betterment over perfection.

8. Question yourself. Is this part of my life something I need to change because it is toxic or merely because it is unconventional or different? Am I embracing my uniqueness, or merely tolerating it? Is this “the way I am” or the way others told me I should be?

By: Kallysia Raymond